nickyleggio

So your with someone for over a year and you break up.
He tells u he loves you and wants to be friends but then never calls, texts or IM's.
What is that? i mean i miss him and i don't want to like not talk to him... The breakup was mutual and no one is mad at each other.. but he says he "needs some time."
how much fucking time does someone need? He seems like hes okay...
i guess maybe he doesnt want to talk to me anymore.
im not some dumb bitch whos going to like be all misserable and Fuckin depressed or any of that stupid shit.. but i really care about him and i miss talking to the kid.
i just dont understand what the fuck goes on in others heads..

besides that, this whole beard is taking a while to fully come in. its itchy and i kinda wanna get rid of it, but im sooo close and i don't wanna at the same time. I think i hit rock bottom with my weight. i gained a lot this summer and its bringing be down... so fucking down. so today i started a diet? i guess you can call it that.
i came home at 730 this morn and passed the fuck out. woke up alittle after 2 and then picked up my sister from her friends house. by the time i came home, got ready, and went out i had no time to eat and i was HUNGRY. so me and monica went to Subway...
mmm mmm mmm was that shit good :)
i wanna do the whole subway diet but that shits a crock.... how do u lose weight from only eating subway everyday? u cant.. its just a better choice in eating out.

i want my hair to grow already...
i must mention this in everything i write but i really want it to grow and be all healthy n' shit :)
looking forward to it!

So, Summer oh 8 is almost over...
all the kids are going back to school... except me. I'm taking  a semester off cause i really don't want to be bothered with all the bullshit of completing homework assignments and fucking papers and all that shit.
I work at a library and i see all these people with their work and it looks like it fucking sucks! i don't want to have to deal with that right now.
I also look really different, which im getting used to. I cut off all my hair cause it was out of control! dry and frizzy, breaking all the time.. Such a pain in the ass. i also let some scruff develop on my face.. haha "develop."
Its funny how when i had my long hair and wore makeup and polished my nails.. it felt like the people that i worked with kinda ignored me and never took and initiative to talk to me. I guess they just thought that i was some Freak Fag or something.
but i am deff digging the whole "man" look :)
I do miss the real me... but its nice to play dress up once in a while. I can walk down the street or in a store and not get stared at... its weird cause im so used to hearing "mommy, is that a boy or a girl?"  haha
Anyway, this summer was pretty good... i hung out with my friends every day and even went on a vacation... but it wasn't like a real vacation. My dad lives in Arizona with his Gross Girlfriend and my brother. they moved out there like 5 years ago and i have only been there twice. Its nothing special... it sucks when you have this fucking monster bitch breathing down your neck telling you what you should and shouldn't do. Me being Me of course fucked up and wrote some shit about my dads GF on my Xanga journal and she went through the history and read everything... there was a big fight and now i think they broke up? my dad is moving to this new condo and hes taking my bro with him... good. its nice that hes getting out of that fucked up relationship and starting a new life.
This summer did have some downfalls....
i spent so much money of food and gained a lot of weight. This winter that will change, saving saving saving money and im gunna start getting picky on what i eat.
No one needs an unhealthy body and its time to fix it :)

Back to my hair... im waiting for this shit to grow a little longer so i can stop pretending to be someone els...
and get back to Me. I miss me... I don't know who i am with this hair. i know i sound ridiculous but its true... my hair has been very important to me ever since i can remember....
Always a problem if i got a bust fuck haircut.. i would throw such a fit and freak out over a haircut. its hair... and it will grow back! i cant tend to grasp that concept but im starting to realize it.

Tomorrows Sunday and its the beginning of a whole new week! i think i need some new changes....
Change number one.. Shave this shit off my face :)

Stress sucks bro!
terrible.

School is so annoying, i cant wait for it to be over.
damn....Work is okay.
i mean the head childrens librarian is such a FUCK.
shes a horrible woman and i dont know why.
Mrs holtz (head adult librarian) say's that mrs oconnell (head childrens librarian) loves that im such a good worker and is impressed with me..
okay, whatever... its all nice to hear but how bout the bitch show it!
you know what i dont care, shes old and misserable.
i hope im not like that when im old... :(


Christmas is coming soon!
i think 3 weeks?
i cant wait to see what my friends got me!
expecially my boyfriend, he gave me hints to what it is..
and he said that i wanted it..
okay, like thats going to help me.
i want everything!
i know im terrible, i love presants :)
but who doesnt?

I have to clean my room so bad, its a mess!
im such a procrastinator(sp?) it isnt even funny.
I NEED A HAIR CUT LIKE BAD!
i look like a fucking retard..
i hate it :(
so not cute.



iv been drinking fuze's the past few days..
my friend kristy introduced them to me over the summer and i was out with my mom on sunday and we saw em for a buck each!
so i bought 4.
Sweet.
yeah, i need to get to bed cause i have a long annoying day ahead of me tomarrrow.
goodnite.

xoxo
nicky leGGio

yeah so tomarrows gunna be thanksgiving and i think thats pretty cool.
things are going pretty good and im ready for christmas!
i want my presants :)
im off to queens tomarrow to grams house..
the family should all be there but minus a few.
some stupid dick shit...
i think its redic the way people are in my family and make such a big deal out of little shit.
but whatever, im not going to let anything get to me..
it should be a good day.
i hope everyone has a great thanksgiving!!

its only november 7th...
i have to wait til june something to be finished with school..
i can not wait!
i cant stand anyone there and everyone is just fucking stupid!
i actually stood home today because i have no work and i thought to myself that scince i had no work i would take a mental health day :)
i cut some weave and put em in..
haha its longer than usual but thats the pont.
its all one color and kinda plane jane but its good for now.
my bathroom isnt finished yett so i am still using my mothers bathroom.
i hate it!
it sucks having to plan out what time everyone is going to use the shower...
its times like this when i take my bathroom for granted.
whatever, it'll be finished sometime this week.
i think im going to see a movie tonight..
who knows?
im out.
peace<3

i guess you can say that today was the last day of summer for me.
i have work tomarrow and then school wednesday.
ugh, so not ready for that.
its my last year and im so stoked!
i cant wait to get out of highschool.. but im always told that im going to miss it or some shit.
but why would i miss all the fucking bullshit that people cause?
i duno..
im praying that this year will be the best.
i want it to go by fast.
the thing thats really going to suck is  that my great friend jackie isnt going to be with me..
bitch graduated :(
whatever, i guess i just have to make the best of it.
goodnight.


-nicky

so i just made this account..
i have another buzznet account with my friend jackie
but we never really update it together so i decided to make one for myself.
videos and pictures soon!